kingdom-crazy

If ever there was a force surer than sound it would be that of love. You cant hide your head and plug your ears from love. It comes on like a sonic boom and drowns all other inputs in its wake. It is strong and merciless and fills your head with the greatest music. But in then end it will leave you like a siren passing in the night. Having come on in a rush and fury and leaving just as quickly. But unlike the silence left by sound the silence left by love can never be filled once it is lost for good.

Do you know what it it to love someone But theres an unbridgable chasm between you Nothing you try matters No matter how hard or earnest You just want to feel like you matter But no matter how hard you love Regardless of the depth of your feelings There's nothing you can do You will never be loved as much as you love. And you will never matter as much as they matter. Every second with them hurts. But every second without them is pure agony. When it comes to the heart there is no winning. You can only pick by how much and to what degree you want to lose.

It’s the lies we tell ourselves That truly show what’s actually there to see As much as we say we want real and meaningful We settle for beautiful lies The lies make us feel like we matter If only for a while or in certain instances If you’re lonely enough or long enough You will welcome the lies Even though you know it’ll hurt When the liescape is broken one day But the pain will be nothing Compared to the constant torture Of what life would be like without the lies I am beautiful I am smart I am strong I am loved I matter Just a life of one dreamt lie after another.

Sometimes its nice to dream Even if you’re not sure it means anything Nice to dream of love and an end to loneliness Of happiness and joy unending Of loving and being loved To feel for a time that you’re actually wanted And not just and outcast anathema To be scorned, hated and all alone Its nice to pretend for a while that all this is an actual possibility To think, just for a moment, that everything will turn out all right To actually have hope and be optimistic For a better and happy future. But the something shakes the day dream And it all evaporates away Leaving you back where you started Sad, and alone. Sometimes its nic

Darkness That’s all I was All I saw Chained and bound Then I met you A random happenstance A one in a million coincidence But somehow You were different We got to know each other Became close quickly Friends Best of friends You wanted in my heart As I had become part of yours Some how By just being me I was hesitant I was scared I don’t trust Quickly or wholly But somehow You were different I took a chance Went against everything Everything inside of me It screamed Warned me Told me to stop But you were different You made me happy For the first time In so long I was happy You didn’t just bring me joy You brought me freed

Whats a poet without words? Wings without birds? A guitar without strings? A song that noone sings? A beginning without end? Fun without a friend? What is life with out love? This is what hopelessness is made of.

We are all broken. In one way or another. We are all lost. In one place or another. We are all looking for something. Of one kind or another. Some of us are better at hiding it. With one mask or another. Some of us are better at ignoring it. With one distraction or another. Some of us are better at dodging it. With one defense or another. But some of us are not. But some of us can not. But some of us do not. But we all still hurt. Behind our eyes. In the places you can not see. We all feel forgotten. By a world we never felt a part of. But we are still here. Despite the pain. But we are still alive. Despite the anger. But we are still t

Loneliness is the most divine of emotions. We were all born out of loneliness. Everything we are. All that exists on earth. And off it. A loneliness so deep and so powerful it sparked the creation of the heavens and the earth. While I may not be deep. And I may not be powerful. I think I understand that first emotion. Because it is my only one.

Is this all there is to life? Endless emptiness? I have nothing to fill my days. But silence. And loneliness. I just trudge along as it all grinds. I am always alone. Always hurting. Always sad. Is the truly all there is to me? Do I really have so little to offer That I am doomed to die bitter and alone? I just want…something. Anything But all I ever have is nothing unending. No love. No happiness. No peace. This is all I seem to be. Lost. No might or magic. No high seas adventure or pixie dust. At the end of the day I am just a lost boy. Looking for his Wendy.

I live for the tired and weary The down and dreary I move on for the damaged and broken The quiet and soft spoken For all the hurt this life has begotten I will be strong for all the forgotten